After 18 Months in Survival Mode, I Booked a Somatic Retreat in Ibiza with Eline. Here Is What Changed (and What Didn’t)
An honest guest review from Missy, who booked the 1:1 retreat with me. She decided to write a blog post after about her experiences. This has been shared with her permission and in her own words. Want more info? Check it out here!
Missy came on a 1:1 somatic retreat in Ibiza after more than 1,5 years in survival mode with chronic pain and a dysregulated nervous system. Her honest review is here below.
If you live with chronic illness and you are wondering whether a somatic retreat could be right for you, just read her story. It might be a good place to start.
What is a somatic retreat?
But first, let’s quickly recap what a “somatic retreat” actually entails.
A somatic retreat is a healing modality built around the body instead of the story. Somatic work means paying attention to what you feel in your body, such as tension or a racing heart, and learning to respond in a way that feels safe to your body, instead of pushing through. A 1:1 somatic retreat in Ibiza means one guest (you) and one facilitator (me), with everything personalised to your energy levels and what your body needs. There is no group schedule to keep up with, and rest counts as part of the work.
It is a gentle way to support nervous system healing for people living with chronic illness or chronic pain, and it never replaces medical care. Also for anyone wanting to connect to their bodies instead of living from the mind, this is for you!
Here is how Missy experienced it.
Want to learn more about my own somatic healing? Read this post!
When every “magic solution” only made me feel more broken
In search of answers as to why my body and I seemed to be in a constant state of battle with each other, I read story after story online about other people’s healing journeys.
Instagram showed me nothing but success stories. Ice baths, red-light therapy, emotional freedom tapping (EFT), breathing circles, countless supplements and medications, no-sugar-no-lactose-no-gluten diets, journaling, running therapy, talk therapy, EMDR, cranial therapy, reiki, feeling exposure, manifesting… All the things that seemed to be the “magic” solution for others only made me feel more broken. I was still in pain. Still hypervigilant. Still stuck.
Doctors told me they couldn’t find anything specific and that all I should do was rest and take painkillers. Psychologists told me I had to accept my “new” life and not give too much attention to the stabbing pain in my chest, the panic attacks that came out of nowhere, my trembling hands, or the sporadic fainting, because focusing on it would only give it more power. Because others couldn’t help me, I became obsessed with fixing myself. I wanted my old life back: working, going to the gym four times a week, seeing friends, maybe even starting a family.
What a dysregulated nervous system did to my life
My dysregulated nervous system had other plans. Noises were too loud. Lights were too bright. A shift in someone’s tone of voice could send me spiralling for days. I stopped trusting myself, my body, my instincts, and eventually other people too.
(Nervous system dysregulation is the term many people use when the body stays stuck in a threat response long after the danger has passed. It can show up as pain, panic, sensory overload and exhaustion. Click here for more info)
The longer I searched for answers, the more anxious, desperate, and exhausted I became. After more than a year and a half of living in survival mode, I had lost a lot of weight, my relationship, my dog, my home, my community, and my ability to work. I moved back in with my parents and truly believed this was it: I am broken. I saw only failure, failure to keep up, to function, to be “good” in the way society had taught me to be.
How I found Eline, 18 years after high school
And then, I stumbled upon Eline’s Instagram. I watched a video where she shared her journey with chronic illness, and I was amazed. Not only because it gave me hope, but because Eline and I had crossed paths years ago, back in high school. Life moved on, and we lost touch, but when I was at my absolute lowest, her page appeared on my feed, and almost without thinking, I sent her a message. Minutes later, she replied:
“This cannot be a coincidence. I was thinking of you just yesterday…”
What are the odds of that, after eighteen years? Right away, I knew I was in the right place.
Why a 1:1 somatic retreat felt different
We scheduled a call. I was nervous. In my eyes, Eline was doing everything “right”, and I felt ashamed for needing help. But the moment we started talking, that feeling disappeared. For the first time in a long time, someone listened and responded not with advice, judgment, or quick fixes, but with questions. She could tell I had become very good at telling my story, yet she gently invited me to look beneath it. With curiosity. With kindness.
Instead of telling me what to do, Eline challenged my thoughts and met me exactly where I was, sometimes with encouragement, sometimes with a gentle push, sometimes by giving me time or letting me take the lead. I felt truly seen in who I am now, but also as my inner child, through somatic work that meets me where I am. Nervous system healing only started making sense to me when I met Eline.
Of course, I doubted whether a somatic retreat would help. I had tried so much already. Why would this be different? But when Eline told me she wasn’t here to heal or fix me, something so many others had promised before, I decided to take the plunge. She asked me to trust myself, trust her, and let go of expectations. Before I knew it, I was on a plane to Ibiza for my 1:1 somatic retreat, on my way to the best gift I’ve ever given myself.
curious to see what a retreat can look like for you? check out this page
My somatic retreat in Ibiza
What happened on the island is deeply personal, and I choose not to share too many of the details, as I want to keep the experience mine and sacred to me.
What I can say is this: Eline goes above and beyond to make you feel safe and cared for, from the moment you land to the moment you return home. She welcomed me into her world, the place where she found herself again: the beautiful island of Ibiza. With the sweet scent of trees and salt in the ocean air, the warmth of the sun, the slower pace of life, and the openness of the people, it reminded me of my home country, South Africa. She shared the stories the island carries and introduced me to a more spiritual way of healing, without ever forcing me into something that didn’t feel right.
Thank you, Eline, for driving me from one beautiful place to the next, for the incredible food prepared by your husband Marcus, the beautiful accommodation overlooking the hills, the sunrise views, and for knowing when to hold my hand and when to give me space. Most of all, thank you for teaching me a new way of listening to my body. For creating space to speak up, to challenge my thoughts, and to tune inward with patience, time, and love. Thank you for being the older sister I never had, but always had to be (to the best little sister in the entire world). For letting me be held, physically and emotionally. For creating a space where I could speak without fear of judgment. And most of all, for reminding me how to laugh again.
So, did my pain disappear? An honest answer
Did my pain disappear? Did my anxiety melt away? No. But something shifted. Curiosity replaced part of the fear. I began to meet the Missy behind the limiting beliefs, not just the healed or polished version, but every part of her. The part that wants to dance with glitter on her face. The grieving part. The disappointed part. The messy, honest, shining parts I had pushed away for so long.
Leaving the island was bittersweet. On the last day, joined by her husband Marcus, we sat outside the cutest café for coffee, cake, and a moment of reflection. As the rain fell softly on the parasols and we talked about how moving to Ibiza had changed their lives, I felt like I was in the presence of real love. And in that moment, I felt so inspired and excited for the future. I knew this would not be the last time I would visit the island that had given me a sense of safety, peace, and coming home to myself.
What I would say to anyone thinking about a somatic retreat
The retreat was just a start and I cannot wait to dive deeper with Eline in her coaching program these coming months. On the side I am also a proud member of the Spoonies Community with other beautiful women living with chronic illness who cheer each other on in the good and the challenging moments. I believe everyone deserves a community like this and an Eline in their lives. It won’t fix you, but it will steer you in the right direction, with love.
Missy
Ready to talk about it?
If Missy’s story sounds like yours, send me a message or book a free intro call and tell me where you are right now. No pressure, it’s just a conversation.
I’m scared I don’t have enough energy/”spoons” for this retreat
The beauty of organising a private retreat is that I completely create the schedule based on what you can or cannot do! If you can walk? Great! If you cannot walk, then also great! If you need a 2-hour rest during the day - we will arrange that!
As long as you clearly communicate with me what you need, then I can adapt the schedule accordingly. If certain issues arise during the retreat, then also we will adjust accordingly.
I've tried so much already. Why would your program work?
Well - have you already worked with someone who went through a very similar process to yours? That knows first-hand what you are talking about and feels exactly at what part of your journey you are at?
I have tried anything and everything to get to the point where I am at right now and am so ready to share this now with you.
I’m not entirely sure if “now” is the right moment?
You’ve been searching for such a long time already and you can remain this way for a lot longer (trust me, I’ve been there!). There is a possibility to come to this retreat in 3 months from now, but from where I stand, that’s a waste of 3 months.
3 months in which you could’ve grown so much already: in confidence, with tools & new skills, with knowledge, and who knows: maybe you’ve reached a point that you can actually do a fun activity again for an hour/week?
Let me ask you: do you feel that tiny spark of hope? The small whisper inside of you that turns on when you read about this retreat and that says "I want this too"? If you feel that, then you know it is the time to get into this retreat.
What if I don't feel well during the retreat?
The beauty of organising a private retreat is that I completely create the schedule based on what you can or cannot do! If certain issues arise during the retreat, then we will adjust accordingly and listen to your body.
What is included in the price of the retreat?
Included in the price is the following:
- Transportation on the island
- Accommodation & Studio
- Food for the entire time you are here
- All the sessions
Based on the seasonality of the island, I cannot give a fixed price. Please book an intro call with me, so we can discuss the financial part of it.
One of the most important things that is not included is your flights. Please take this into consideration as well.
Can I also join your retreat without chronic illness?
Although my main focus is people with chronic pain, this retreat offers so much more. So to answer your question: Yes! This retreat is for anyone who feels like they want more understanding of and connection to their own body, their own feelings, their intuition, their nervous system (and how to use nervous system regulation) and feeling more confident (eg: in setting boundaries).
I personalise every single program, so I can also do that for the ones without chronic illness!
Why don't you schedule in a (free) discovery call with me and we can discuss the options?
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