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5 Romantic Valentine’s Date Ideas For People With Chronic Illness

Valentine’s Day: one of those moments where people with chronic illness are confronted again with the fact they can’t have a “normal” Romantic Date Night. But, don’t fear! I’ve managed to celebrate Valentine’s Day every year with my partner. So here are a few of my favourite Valentine’s Date Ideas for people with chronic illness.

A Valentine's Date Ideas: a white man and a white woman with brown hair are smiling, standing next to each other, their heads touching. She's holding 3 heart-shaped balloons. They're standing in front of woods (that's blurred)

1 ~ Cooking A Lunch/Dinner Together

Gay couple cooking together. One man is hanging over the pan, smelling the food. The other man is looking at his partner and smiling

If you’re anything like us, you’d like to cook! Why not create a 2-course (or 3) meal for the both of you, get a nice bottle of wine (wine pairing anyone?) and dress to impress! This all sounds a lot more “work” than it actually is, let me explain.

“Dress to Impress”: how I do it. Get a great looking jumpsuit, put your hair up in a high ponytail, wear your earrings, a spray of perfume and that is it (oh, and comfy socks!).

No, I’m not wearing make-up, cause that takes too much energy (to put on ánd to take it off during the night). I’m not wearing heels or shoes that are uncomfortable. Shower? Day before. 

I can almost hear you think: “It sounds nice, but besides the dressing part, still a lot of work.” Let me continue….

We both look for and choose the recipes (just cause we both like that part, you can also take this on if your partner doesn’t like it). Then I create a shopping list in our shared notes (and having the shop delivered of course).

I’d sit at the table (or on the sofa if I don’t have enough energy). And we cook “together”: he does all the physical work and I tell him the next steps of the recipe. Get that glass of wine ready, play some romantic music and light some candles. And I’m sure, FIREWORKS!

If you wanna go the extra mile; why not create menus for you to enjoy the evening with cute photos of when you first started dating vs now?

Psstttt: check out this cookbook, it’s my fave one and great for a date night. We usually make like 4 or 5 different dishes for shared dining

In need of tips & tricks how to get through the day with chronic illness? check out this blog post

Little side story I just háve to share: the most romantic date of the Valentine’s Date Ideas that Marcus did for me:

Marcus organised this date night, but as it was during COVID, we had to get creative.

We once went to this amazing restaurant when travelling to NYC (it’s called Lilia). We both absolutely L-O-V-E-D it.
He called and emailed the restaurant to ask for recipes of the dishes we had there and tried to recreate the whole meal. Until the point of even making his own pasta. The restaurant was a bit reluctant to give out their recipes (which I get…. But still…..), but thankfully Marcus is an amazing chef himself and remembered the flavours, so he did his utmost best to make the experience as nice as we had it in the restaurant (creating the menus included). I can truly say: it was EPIC. And so romantic. And even better than in the restaurant. But I might be slightly biased..

2 ~ Duvet Night

A couple sitting on bed with their dog, eating pizza. Perfect Valentine's Date Ideas

Gosh, this is a famous one in our household. My friends are even coming over for our “Duvet Night” evenings.

We close all the curtains (yes even though it’s daylight), make our home super nice and cosy; we light some candles or a fire (we don’t have this, but I can imagine this makes it extra romantic), dim the lights, put our comfies on, get a nice English brew (which basically is a black tea with milk. But don’t tell Marcus I said this). And most importantly: Put our phone on Do Not Disturb (or completely away in the other room). 

Then we get the duvet out of the bedroom. And we start binge-watching movies/our favourite series/whatever we wanna watch, cuddled up on the sofa. We usually either have a GF pizza or get a take-away. All, so we don’t have to leave our cuddle moments.

Sounds cheesy, but trust me, you will feel like 2 happy kids in a sweets shop! It’s truly amazing how much intimacy can be created putting all phones away and just be in eachothers presence!

3 ~ Pub Crawl with Games

So this one is for if you have a bit more energy and you can leave the house for a bit. Plan out a pub crawl at your favourite bars/pubs in your area. Don’t have more than 1 drink in each bar and make your partner choose your drink (do you trust him/her enough for this?) 

Bring a game along (or create your own quiz!) or have a nice, good conversation. You can use games like “Vertellis” that will prompt you to get into deeper conversations.

(This probably is my favourite of the Valentine’s Date Ideas!)

Other games that you could easily take with you to the pub:

4 ~ Candlelight Concert

You see the corner of the room with the violinist playing in the dark, only lit with candles around them.
The violinist playing around the candles

Yes, I know I’ve already mentioned it before, but I absolutely love this date night.

It’s great for those low-spoon evenings. The shows are only 1-hour, they’re wheelchair accessible in most venues and just give a really romantic vibe.

There are special and extra romantic Valentine’s Day shows as well, so go and check it out! 

wanna read my thoughts on the candlelight concert? check out this blog post!

5 ~ Go For A Drive And Get Lost Watching The Beautiful Views

(extra: prepare a small picnic to take with you)

A beautiful sunset, skies turned orange/pink, at a lake. You see some people having a picnic in the foreground

As a kid, I used to really dislike being in a car for a long time. But as I’ve grown up, I actually really enjoy driving around, just letting your gut tell you where to go. And how amazing is it to go drive somewhere to a beautiful place: maybe the sea, maybe the forest, a place that you have beautiful memories.

Bring a small picnic that’s easy to eat in the car (or actually park up and have a picnic outside in nature). And just chat. Put your phones away and truly connect with one another. You can bring some of the games under #3 if you want to have some inspiration/entertainment.

The Trick For The Best Romantic Valentine’s Date Ideas:

Don’t ever forget: it’s the idea that counts. Valentine’s Day can be tough, especially for those of us living with chronic illness.

If you are in the midst of a flare-up of pain, fatigue or anything else and you can’t do anything: write a post-it and place it on the fridge. Send a card (write it on a day that you are feeling okay and schedule the delivery). Order a bouquet of flowers. That is already enough. Just show the other person you are there for them.

And also: don’t fixate on celebrating Valentine’s Day on the 14th of February itself! There are 364 other days (365 this year!) that you can show the other person as well how much you love them and appreciate them.

So as my usual message is: don’t be too hard on yourself if you can’t make it on the day. It’s so easy to feel guilty, but there is absolutely no need.

want more inspiration for activities? check out this blog post with the best day activities in amsterdam! (Wheelchair accessible)

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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Want more information on accessible museums in Amsterdam? Check out this review on the Museum of Canals in Amsterdam

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  1. I really love this post as I have a friend who has a chronic illness, and this would be the perfect post for her. I will share it with her. Thank you for sharing.

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